LGBT? GLBT? WTF!

Like Montgomery Clift, AKSARBENT has a flash of insight!

Recently, the attention given to Omaha's LGBT community in the wake of LB912, Ben Gray's protected class ordinance amendment, and Coach Ron Brown's continued zealotry has revealed an ongoing problem which Must Be Addressed.
     AKSARBENT has noticed in passing that around here, while some politicians and newscasters say "LGBT," others say "GLBT."
     Inexplicably, they got conflicting memos from the International Homosexual Conspiracy. After seeing several council members comically stumble over these awkward abbreviations, AKSARBENT's board met in executive session to address the matter, except for Lucille, AKSARBENT's Director of Issue Analysis for Government and Public Policy, who was outside trying to sneak up on a black squirrel.
     Our humbly-proposed solution is a model of clarity, practicality and simplicity: BLT+G! Everyone can remember BLT! Even Franklin Thompson! Everyone will be on the same page!
     The genius of our solution became even clearer after several glasses of Argentinian Melbec (really, is there any other kind?), when we realized that BLT+G beautifully accommodates those activists who insist on the inclusion of "Q."
     BLT+GQ! We can't wait to see John Knicely and Rob McCartney get with the program on the channels 6 and 7, 6 p.m. news! "Today, Omaha's BLT+GQ community..."