Springfield, Illinois Bishop Paprocki, who employed bondage priest, says he's worried marriage equality might force him to hire gay-married teacher

In the good old days, the Catholic Church
didn't need to worry about threats to "religious
liberty." Here you see a woodcut of anal torture
practiced during the Inquisition. The victim
was slowly rotated on a sharp point until he
died. Pope John Paul II, now on the church's
fast track to sainthood, observed, “The
Church never imposes, she only proposes.

Bishop Paprocki has been a busy guy lately. First, he finally granted a leave of absence to one of his priests after said cleric, in November, had to call 911 to come to the rectory to get him out of handcuffs and to remove a gag from his mouth (If you think this is funny, then try saying "2119 North 20th...St. Aloysius" and "Come to the 'ront door" with a mouth gag.)
     Then Paprocki had to testify to the Illinois Senate yesterday about how marriage equality, under considera­tion in the Land of Lincoln, might threaten his religious freedom. Then he had to dispatch a letter to be read at all Catholic Churches in his diocese letting parishioners know that legalizing gay couples is a lethal threat to Catholic morality. Such a week!