Last Saturday, the New York Times
published a guest editorial,
Not Going to the Chapel, by Rich Benjamin entitled explaining why he is boycotting the marriages of his friends and relatives, specifically that of Zacharay, his longtime buddy and college classmate.
Though Zach falls into that slim majority, he scolds me for being “peevish.” He says he resents me for blowing off his special day, for putting political beliefs ahead of our friendship and for punishing him for others’ deeds. But screaming zealots aren’t the only obstacles to equal marriage rights; the passivity of good people like Zach who tacitly fortify the inequality of this institution are also to blame.
They’re proof of a double standard: Even well-meaning heterosexuals often describe their own nuptials in deeply personal terms, above and beyond politics, but tend to dismiss same-sex marriage as a political cause, and gay people’s desire to marry as political maneuvering.
In the video below, Benjamin explains why he wrote the column and why he's doing what he's doing.
Oftentimes, when we don't get social change or when we don't get equality in this country, it's not always because of the screaming zealots; sometimes the obstacle to that change is silent, good people who are very passive on an issue and so I feel now my friends will no longer be so silent and so passive.
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