Sunday, June 15, 2014

Chagrined dad has already figured his 9-year-old son's "type:" slim, dark-haired and very pretty boys

@Dave_Blogger just wrote a cute piece for the Huffington Post about his 9-year-old son, already a smooth operator who knows his own mind at an early age:
     One boy stood out from the others, and not just because he was taller than all the rest. His black hair was slicked back with some sort of hair product -- Dapper Dan pomade, perhaps? (Sorry, I didn't even use hair products when I had hair.) He wore fashionable summer clothes and was very pretty, looking a lot like Darren Criss on the show Glee, someone my wife might have mentioned my son liking in the past. So what happened next should not have been a surprise: My normally pathologically shy eldest child came up to this young man and handed him a string of plastic Mardi Gras beads that we had all been playing with the night before.
     "These are for you," my eldest said, a shy smile on his lips and a goofy/happy look in his eye. The older boy took them as you would any trinket given to you by a child, with a smile and a "thank you." The pretty boy and the other kids then ran off, with my son tagging along with them to another part of the house to do whatever it is that clean-cut teenagers do today — something involving social media, I'm sure. Harold waited until they'd all left to speak.
     "Well, that was the cutest thing I've ever seen," he said while doing something with the meaty meat.
     And it was. Here was my boy acting on his feelings, giving a gift to another boy he thought was attractive...
     Cue the Christer haters like professional foam generator Jana Brock, who are now out for blood with their ideological meat axes, filling in what doesn't fit their agenda with boilerplate right-wing slander about the HuffPost's "gaying" of America's children and the dad's "child abuse," consisting of "encouraging him [said son] to go after what he wants. No matter the consequences, be it a virulent sexually transmitted diseases, rape, likely drug abuse, and ultimately Hell.
     AKSARBENT's two cents on this? Well, Brock is a cynical crank beyond redemption, Dave is already a cool dad, so we'll merely address the unjust accusation that Darren Criss is a pretty boy. He may be cute, he may be handsome, but he ain't a pretty boy.

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